Crappy Chemo #4

I'm back! Not sure why it took me 3 weeks between posts.....partly sick, partly busy, partly lazy!! Well, I had chemo #4 today. It went well...had labwork this morning, then met with Dr. Nichols and then on to chemo...I think this was record time..was in chemo suite by 9:30 and out by 1pm!! James and I went to Olive Garden and had lunch together and then I did my usual after chemo...drove back to work and took a nap in the car before going in to work. I get benadryl with my chemo tx and it just really makes me tired, plus I usually dont sleep well when I start those dumb steroids!! The steroids do not allow me to sleep for more than an hour at a time, and they increase the hot flashes, and instigate the heartburn!!  Dr. Nichols gave me some prescriptions to use for my heartburn...I pray that these will help...uuuugggghhhh, its sooooo miserable!!! So now here I sit, wondering when its going to hit me, what its going to be like this time, how long its going to last??  I could sit and wonder, or just know that it is what it is and keep moving forward knowing that my body is being healed of cancer!!  I only have 2 treatments left, August 2nd & August 23rd.  Surgery is tentativly scheduled for September 19th. Im in the process of working out the details.  Its just amazing to think that this whole thing started April 5th, 2011 and just 5 months later I will be on the recovery side, the survivor side!!  It feels like it has been an eternity since diagnosis day, but when its all over to look back and think 5 months...thats not bad at all!  I do know I will have to add in some recovery time to my surgery...Dr. Nichols said 6-8 weeks for recovery!  I was thinking like 2!  Hahaha.  She kind of laughed when I said that...the laugh that meant "Good Luck with that"  lol   I also have to continue with the herceptin for a year, right now its every week, but after chemo is done it will be changed to every 3 weeks, but that has very little side effects....well other than the fact that it could weaken your heart muscle!!  I will have another EKG after my last chemo to make sure everything is all good, and then be checked again every 3 months.  I have to say this has been such a learning experience.   I am very excited to be able to help others with the information I have gathered and the journey Ive experienced.  I want to thank so many of you for all the prayers, meals, support....And thanks to those of you that have bought me hats and scarves!  I love them all, and its so fun to go to work with different hats each day!  Well, that is it for my rambling brain for tonight.  I love you all and I continue to feel the peace and comfort from your prayers.  Thank you so much!

~Fierce Faith~

Crappy Chemo #3

4:38 am! 4hours 32 minutes 27 seconds (but who's counting) until round 3! The last week has been great, I've felt good, energy level is up! Its amazing how that 1 great week totally prepares your mind to go in and do it all again. Not to mention my least fav side effect, (but maybe theres more to it than we know) is "chemo brain" I know I just simply forget those 4-7 crappy days! You women with kids can relate when you were pregnant...its like you're only functioning with half a brain! (For men..its like your every day life!) Haha, totally kidding! This is where a sense of humor and ALOT of grace from my friends and family is soooo important!! Funny story for ya: Mom meets me up at Chee Chees to pick out my wig, when we leave my car won't start. So, I get out the jumper cables...imagine if you will....sweet little nanny (who's knowledge of cars is that it gets her to the mall for shopping, lol!) Although she's assisted in more than a handful of these jumpings...all with my car! & then you got me...mush brain.... so, everythings hooked up, we start the cars, yiiipppe, it worked! We disconnect the jumper cables, I go to put my hood down...and the few working brain cells say " make sure you have your keys before you close the hood" Im rubbing my pockets, looking to see if I set them near the battery...now Im in a panic!! No sooner do the words come out of my mouth, "I can't find my keys!" That I look at mom and realize my car is running!! Hahaha! I suppose that could have had a more severe outcome than it did! Lol So, if any of you have been waiting for God to reveal something to you, or answer a prayer...give him some time...he's been workin overtime with me lately! Lol The real scary thing is that I then get behind the wheel and drive down the same streets many of you are driving on!! So, watch out for 16 year olds, and chemo patients!! Lol

Ok...So here we go #3...the halfway point! Its so hard to believe its only been 2 1/2 months since the life changing news! It feels like an eternity, yet so much has happened so fast! I will never be happy that I had cancer, but I will ALWAYS be greatful for how it changed my life; how close it has brought my family, the blessings Ive received, the strength I've been given, the fears Ive been faced with...and overcome! The opportunity to see through hurting eyes! So many many things that have changed me and who I am and how I think and how I look at others, FOREVER. Life is precious, you never know what will happen tomorrow....live each day as if it were your last...Love! Laugh! Hug! Say I'm sorry! Say I love you! Say Thank you! Appreciate what you've been given! No regrets!! Love you all!
~Fierce Faith~

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Well, I'm sitting at ccnw for my weekly herceptin infusion.....so many emotions...I look at all these people around me, all different walks of life. 14 chairs.....all filled by someone that has been diagnosed with some form of cancer. I can't help but ask all the "W's"........ What is cancer....Where did it come from? Why these people? Why me?!?
I could sit and wonder these un-answerable questions all day, but it only makes me feel worse. Instead, I will focus on the amazing things I love in my life...the things that make sense to me...the things I choose! My friends, my family, my savior! Thank you to all those that continue to pray for my family and I. That continue to support "Team Steph" I am so lucky to have all of your love and prayers!

God Bless ~Fierce Faith~

Bad blogger!

Its official...I am a bad blogger! Promised I'd post at my last chemo, and here we are a week and a half later! (I started this on June 8th....but it is now Saturday June 11th!! )So, a quick catch up...round 2 went really well, I was out in 3 1/2 hours. Mom was there keeping me company! Felt good Wed. and Thurs. By Friday I was really tired and had horrible heart burn. Symptoms not as severe as the first tx. But Monday and Tuesday and still today, mouth sores, sore throat & nausea! And I still have heart burn. All in all not nearly as bad as the first time, but lots more fatigue. Which I think is normal with each additional tx. I guess I just have a new "normal"
I did get a wig! My amazing coworkers collected enough money to get me a human hair wig from Chee Chees. I just got it yesterday. Chee Chee cut and styled it, and showed me how to care for it. I will post a pic....still trying to get used to it myself! My scalp is so sensitive right now. All the little stubbles are slowly coming out.
Today is a good day! Weve got the Liberty Lake yard sales, the farmers market, and nice weather! So, I am going to enjoy this time with friends and family! I have so much I want to post, but my mind is running so fast! So this is it for now.
Love you all ~fierce fairh~

Chemo Eve

Twas the night before chemo and all through the house not a creature was stirring....except for me! Lol Last steroid taken at a quarter to five...my body's not sleepin, its ready to drive.....the vacuum!! Ok, I'll stop. Just wanted to get out a quick post before round 2 of UCFC. I will be sure to post once we step into the ring again. 6-1-11 cancer vs chemo. I'm feeling great, ready to fight the aftermath of chemo again! I've got my bag packed, lots of books and drinks (no they do not contain alcohol) Keep the prayers coming. Until tomorrow....good night!

Love ~Fierce Faith ~

Hair today....Gone tomorrow

Again, I apologize for so long between posts! When I feel good, I am so busy working and keeping ahead of cleaning and laundry, I just don't take the time to sit down and post.
Well....as I was mentioning in my last post my hair was slowly coming to an end....on Thursday at 11am, I had to let it all go!!! LOL From Monday to Thursday it changed from coming out in my fingers if Id run my hands through it to being able to pull chunks out from the root. I couldn't do anything with it, so my dear hairdresser (and best friend) met me at her salon with pink balloons and a dozen pink roses for a farewell to my beloved hair!! Mom was there as well with her camera in hand! Some tears were shed not just by us but by other hairdressers and clients of the salon, they were all so supportive showing amazing love and uplifting me with compliments and hugs that it will soon grow back. I have to say it was a pretty big shock, but I was so grateful to see that my head was free of moles, birthmarks, fat rolls, etc!!  I am now in the market for cute hats!  I am still trying to find the right wig....havent found "the one" yet, but I am completely content with hats.  I didnt think I'd like scarves, but have seen some pretty cute ones.  So, I guess I would have to say I am adjusting rather well to my "chrome dome"  Another hurdle on my journey that is now behind me. 


My 2nd Chemo was moved from the 31st to June 1st.  So, Wednesday at 8am I start round 2 of the UCFC.   The good news.....I know what to expect this time.  The bad news.....I know what to expect this time!  Lol  I saw a quote on a preview for a new movie that said, "There is no force on Earth more powerful than the will to live"  I will take this quote through my darkest days of round 2.  I will fight like a girl!!!  I will prove to God that he has the right player in the right position for what he has called me to do! I will strive to be an inspiration to my family & friends, and anyone faced with cancer and the loved ones that support them.  I have the will to live and I WILL be a survivor!! 

I love you all!  Fierce Faith

My Chrome Dome Posse'

Brother Jason, John, me & James